Butter Up

24 baby food jars half full of heavy cream and salt.

24 seven year olds shouting and wiggling, dancing and giggling.

24,000 little spatters of heavy cream everywhere.

24 little pats of butter to take home for Thanksgiving.

0 nervous breakdowns.

Priceless.

Long Vowel Logistics

The Criminals are supposed to write me a note if they get to a learning center and there are no response sheets left. They let me know they need more, I make the copies, problem solved.

Except this week I got this note:

"Dear Miss Victoria, We need more Opposites Games shits. We needs lots of shites. Blue Group"

Hm, this week, review long e spellings.

FAIL

Okay, so my own kid has swine flu - no NaBloPoMo for me! She's hanging in with a very high fever and lousy cough. Stay tuned for a return to normal life.

The Next Van Gogh

Okay, so I'm doing writing conferences, and I look up to see one of my boys working industriously, nay frantically, in his blue writer's notebook.

Intrigued, I say "Wow Oscar! You really must have a good story going there, let me see it!"

Reluctantly he walks over and hands me his book.

He has been working absorbedly on...

drawing boobies.